When we first learned that The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives star Jen Affleck was powering through rehearsals for season 34 of Dancing With the Stars a mere two months postpartum, we—like so many others—had questions. Could her body handle the hip-swaying, leg-kicking, and straight-up flying through the air? And how was she faring mentally with all this high-key training while having three little ones at home? Happily for us, the MomTok star took a break from rehearsals last week to give us a behind-the-scenes look at the experience that she says is “a lot harder than I was expecting.”
From a physical standpoint, Affleck is hurting. “Ballroom is, I kid you not, a sport,” she tells SELF. “I have blisters on my feet, bruises all over my body.” No doubt, that could apply to any of the celebs—learning pro choreo at hyperspeed isn’t for the faint of heart (or body).
But as for the postpartum of it all? Affleck seems to be remarkably resilient. Her pelvic floor is “great, surprisingly,” she claims, crediting a lifetime of staying active, including throughout her three pregnancies, for the strength of both her pelvis and the rest of her body. During each one, she did “tons of yoga,” worked on her core strength (with deep breathing exercises), and most of all, “was a very active walker.” We’re talkin’ miles at a time. She says it was her pregnancy-friendly swap for running, which has long been one of her favorite forms of exercise. (Let’s not forget, Affleck ran the New York City marathon just three months after giving birth to her second.)
The only part of postpartum life that makes the show extra-challenging, she says, is the sleep loss. “It’s been hard to get in a full seven, even six, hours of sleep most nights because I still have a newborn,” Affleck says. “It makes recovering even harder.” But luckily, she’s been getting plenty of support from the DWTS physical therapists, she says, who wrap her up in tape and cold packs on the reg and encourage her to do “lots of ice baths”—which she says are “the worst” but worth it to help speed along her recovery.
Mentally, however, being on the show has only uplifted her. Affleck has been open in the past about her experiences with prenatal and postpartum depression, and the suicidal thoughts that ultimately pushed her to pause filming during season 2 of Mormon Wives. Being on DWTS has “helped me in so many ways,” she says because dancing has always been how she’s coped with mental struggles. The videos that initially skyrocketed her to MomTok fame were of her and her kids having dance parties on her kitchen countertop—a motif that popped up in her and her pro partner Jan Ravnik’s episode 2 quickstep.
The would-be stress of competing for votes on live television also doesn’t seem to phase Affleck, even as she faces off against one of her MomTok peers and Mormon Wives co-stars Whitney Leavitt. Though Affleck admits that parts of season 3 of Mormon Wives were “really rocky” for the two of them (it’s scheduled to premiere November 13), she says there’s no bad blood between them now “because we’re both focusing on what we love, which is dancing.” But if anyone is the competitor? It’s Whitney, she says. “She grew up competing in dance and has a degree in dance, so there’s no question that she’s bringing that fire.”
Ultimately, Affleck is thrilled to show off a “happy, positive, bubbly” side of herself—“who I am to the core,” she attests—on the DWTS stage, particularly after “being portrayed as this kind of depressing person” on Mormon Wives, she says. And she hopes it inspires the moms who follow her to find outlets for self-expression and joy too.
Her best advice to the mothers who also need or want to take on a physical task soon after childbirth is to “find some way to stay active” while pregnant, even if it’s just for a few minutes each day. Affleck’s ideas? Turning on a song you love and dancing around while cleaning, throwing a post-dinner dance party, or going on a walk around the neighborhood.
And above all, “give yourself grace,” she adds. “Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs that anyone can take on—and I think a lot of us constantly feel mom guilt or like we’re not doing enough, but just know that doing your best is enough.”
Affleck will take the stage again tonight, September 30, on episode 3 with a dance that she says will reference her latest viral video: “You can expect me to be wearing a hospital gown!”
Related:
- How to Prepare for the Emotional, Physical, and Social Realities of Life Postpartum
- Do Postpartum Belly Bands and Wraps Actually Help With Core Recovery?
- Postpartum Snapback Culture Hurt My Mental Health. Here’s How I Made Fitness My Own Again
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